Our learning goals are to:
-Write a description, using powerful words and phrases
-include some Te Reo Māori
The Deep Orange Sand Storm
I heard a thud at the door. I looked out the window and I saw that the sky was
no longer blue it had turned to karaka-orange. There was sand flying
everywhere. I opened the door to get a closer look but then as I opened the
door I knew it was a mistake. I tried to shut the door but the wind was too
strong, it was like a gorilla trying to pull my door off its hinges.
no longer blue it had turned to karaka-orange. There was sand flying
everywhere. I opened the door to get a closer look but then as I opened the
door I knew it was a mistake. I tried to shut the door but the wind was too
strong, it was like a gorilla trying to pull my door off its hinges.
The sand came rushing into my house. The karaka- orange sand whooshed
around me like a cheetah. It sounded like a hurricane bang, crash, whoosh.
As the sand hit my face the surface of the sand felt rough and damp. Finally
I managed to shut the door. I ran inside and checked my house. There was sand everywhere! And it was half way up the wall. I started to dig to try and save my delicate belongings. As I started to dig the door burst open and I felt a shiver down my spine. I turned to look at the door and I saw a huge tornado made of sand….
around me like a cheetah. It sounded like a hurricane bang, crash, whoosh.
As the sand hit my face the surface of the sand felt rough and damp. Finally
I managed to shut the door. I ran inside and checked my house. There was sand everywhere! And it was half way up the wall. I started to dig to try and save my delicate belongings. As I started to dig the door burst open and I felt a shiver down my spine. I turned to look at the door and I saw a huge tornado made of sand….
Well done Hannah for creating a short piece of descriptive writing from one of these images. I liked how you described the sandstorm in a way that I could imagine being there with your character - “The karaka- orange sand whooshed around me like a cheetah. It sounded like a hurricane bang, crash, whoosh. As the sand hit my face the surface of the sand felt rough and damp. “
ReplyDeleteYou also had good spelling and paragraphing of your work. I want you to keep working on using a range of language. Use a thesaurus to help you.